Politician’s brain



A man walks into a scientist’s lab looking to buy a new brain. He asks the scientist how much the brains cost.

The scientist says, “Well first we have a normal human brain, it costs $1000, next we have a scientist’s brain, it costs $5000, and then we come to a politician’s, it costs $10,000.”

politician-brain.jpg

“How come the politician’s brain costs so much?”, asks the man.

The scientist replies, “Because it’s never been used.”

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Punya ka kaam



Beta Maa se: Maa, aaj maine bahut punya ka kam kiya.

Maa: Kya kiya Beta?

mostherson.jpg

Beta: Maine aaj ek andhi aurat ko road paar karaya.

Maa: Waah! Magar tumhe koi dikkat toh nahi hui.

Beta: Bahut dikkat hui maa. Woh aurat road hi nahi paar karna chah rahi thi!

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Laloo in hell



Rabri Devi died and went to hell (as expected…)

As she stood in front of Yamraj, she saw a huge wall of clocks behind.

She asked, What are all those clocks?

clock

Yamraj answered, Those are Lie Clocks. Everyone on earth has a Lie Clock. Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move.

Rabri : “Oh”, Who’s clock is that?

Yamraj : âThat’s Gautam Buddha’s. The hands have never moved indicating that he never told a lie.

Rabri
: And whose clock is that?

Yamraj
: That’s Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands have only moved twice, telling us that Abraham only told 2 lies in his entire life.

Rabri : Where’s my Laloo’s clock?

Yamraj
: Laloo’s clock is in my office, I’m using it as ceiling fan.

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I want toilet paper



Banta comes to Australia and goes to Woolworths’s (Ubiquitious grocery store in Australia). He finds cat food at special prices. He picks a dozen cans of cat food and goes to check out.

The Manager gets suspicious. He thinks that this guy cannot have a cat and will probably feed cat food to his kids.
Continue Reading »

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ATM machine



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