A man walks into a scientist’s lab looking to buy a new brain. He asks the scientist how much the brains cost.
The scientist says, “Well first we have a normal human brain, it costs $1000, next we have a scientist’s brain, it costs $5000, and then we come to a politician’s, it costs $10,000.”
“How come the politician’s brain costs so much?”, asks the man.
The scientist replies, “Because it’s never been used.”
Sometime after independence three great leaders of the country -
Mahatma Gandhi, Lal Bahadur Shastri and Jawaharlal Nehru went to heaven.
God asked Lal Bahadur Shastri how many children he had during his time
on earth. He replied saying he had three! Happy with the relatively good family planning adopted, God gave Shastri a Mercedes!
Jawaharlal is next and on replying that he had 15 children, God is pretty angry and gives him an inexpensive Maruti.
Sometime later the three see Mahatma Gandhi returning on foot. They ask why God hadn’t given him anything. Gandhiji replied with anger, “Some idiot told God that I was the father of the nation!“
Air Force One crashed in the middle of rural America. Panic stricken the Secret Service mobilized and descended on the farm in force. When they got there, the wreckage was clear. The aircraft was totally destroyed with only a burned hulk left smoldering in a tree line that bordered a farm.
Secret Service descended upon the smoking hulk but could find no remains of the crew or the President’s staff. To their amazement, a lone farmer was plowing a field not too far away as if nothing at all happened. They hurried over to surround the man’s tractor.
“Sir,” the senior Secret Service agent asked, panting and out of breath.
“Did you see this terrible accident happen?”
“Yep. Sure did.” The man muttered unconcernedly.
“Do you realize that is the President of the United States airplane?”
“Yep.”
“Were there any survivors?” the agent gasped.
“Nope. They all kilt straight out.” The farmer sighed cutting off his tractor motor. “I done buried them all myself. Took most of the morning.”
“The President of the United States is dead?” The agent gulped in disbelief.
“Well,” the farmer sighed, obviously wanting to get back to his work. “He kept a-saying he wasn’t… but you know what a liar he is.”
Laloo to his P.A.: Itne khiladi kyun football ko laat maar rahe hai?
P.A.: Goal kar ne k liye.
Laloo: Susra, ball toh pahle se hi gol hai aur kitna gol karenge!
Once upon a time, the six peoples were traveling in a private plane and that six persons were bollywood king sharukh khan, congress president sonia gandhi, railway minister lalu yadav, small boy, one old man and a pilot.
Suddenly the problem starts in a plane so pilot told everybody to get out but the problem was there were only 5 parachutes but the people were six.
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