Jokes Duniya

Jaggu was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was
really pissed.

She told him “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the
garage that goes from 0 to 100 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!“

The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke
up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box
gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought
the box back in the house.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

A store that sells husbands has just opened where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men…

The store is composed of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.

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For those of you who don’t already know, these are the rules that are in effect
in every relationship.

1. The female always makes the rules.

2. These rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.

3. No male can possibly know all the rules.

4. If the female suspects that the male knows all the rules, she must
immediately change some or all of the rules.

5. The female is never wrong.

6. If the female is wrong, it is because of a vagrant misunderstanding which
was a direct result of something the male said or did wrong.

7. If rule number 6 applies, the male must immediately apologize for causing
the misunderstanding.

8. The female can change her mind at any given point in time.

9. The male must never change his mind without express written consent of the
female.

10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.

11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to be
angry or upset.

12. The female must under no circumstances let the male know whether she wants
him to be calm, angry or upset.

13. Any attempt to document these rules could result in bodily harm.

14. The female always gets the last word!

A wife decides to take her husband to a strip club for his birthday. They arrive at the club and the doorman says, “Hey, Dave! How ya doin?“

His wife is puzzled and asks if he’s been to this club before. “Oh! no,” says Dave.

“He’s on my bowling team.”

When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he’d like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,”How did she know that you drink Budweiser?”

“She’s in the Ladies Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them.”

A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says “Hi Davey. Want your usual table dance, big boy?”

Dave’s wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club. Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab.

Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.

She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book. The cabby turns his head and says, “Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave.”

Ek aadmi doosrey aadmi sey bola:

“Bivi aur ghadi mey kya faraq hey?”

Doosra Aadmi bola:

“Ek bigarti hai to bandh ho jati hai……Doosari bigarti hai to “SHUROO” ho jati hai”